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Honour your Tears

The beauty of allowing tears to heal your heart

17th July 2018

This week I had a painful experience of witnessing two people in their wounding not being able to connect and see each other. It really moved me, perhaps stirring some childhood experiences of feeling powerless in the face of conflict. I realised this whole experience had upset me deeply and so I went outside, and lay on the grass for a while. I just quietened my mind for a few minutes and sure enough within minutes I was crying some very deep tears and I felt as if my heart was releasing the sadness of all those times in my life where I haven't been able to help people to love and understand each other.

Most people carry unexpressed grief in their hearts and many clients I work with are highly skilled at avoiding what's there. They fear losing control or collapsing into a place they won't be able to recover from. I feel we have lost the ability to honour our tears and heal our hearts. Crying is a beautiful thing if it comes from a place of compassion and humanity. It's as if the heart can breathe a sigh and say 'thank you, finally I can be at peace now.'

Sometimes I invite my clients to put their hand on their heart and breathe for a few moments and very often within seconds they are in buckets of tears apologising. I always say to them that this is a great strength and nothing to apologise for. I notice how I feel closer to them as a consequence.

We value our minds over our hearts, but our hearts connect us with the deepest yearning of our souls. If your heart is shut down, life is black and white instead of full colour. Living with awareness of mind, body and soul means including your heart because it is in our hearts that we grow in compassion and love for everyone around us.

So why not consider honouring those tears instead of apologising for them, they are there for a reason and they need to feel welcome.

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